# Be Unhappy to Be Happy
Source: https://www.yegor256.com/2019/09/17/be-unhappy-to-be-happy.html
At the very end of one of my [recent meetups](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m5mPtC7LYiY) I was asked a question:
"Are you a happy person?" I mumbled something about being happy from time to time,
but later gave this question more thought. Am I happy? Not really. Well,
sometimes. What makes me happy? And why are [so many of us](https://www.livescience.com/61525-why-are-people-unhappy.html)
unhappy so often?
It seems that there is an answer, and a recipe for happiness.
{% jb_picture_body %}
"A well-paid job, house, car, family are the ultimate possessions
of anyone's life. But _despite_ having everything why is the happiness missing?"
Debika Chakraborty asks [here](https://www.lifealth.com/mind-body-and-soul/happiness/why-despite-having-everything-we-are-not-happy-dc/27095/).
I think that happiness is missing not despite us having everything, but _thanks_ to that.
Happiness, according to [Nietzsche](https://en.wikiquote.org/wiki/The_Antichrist),
is "the feeling that power increases---that a resistance is overcome."
Therefore, in order to be happy, we must have some issues to deal with. It's not enough to possess those
cars, houses and well-paid jobs. We need to overcome the obstacles first.
Happiness is simply impossible without a struggle being won.
{% quote To be happy, we constantly need a new problem to solve, a trouble to get rid of, or an enemy to destroy %}
To be happy, we constantly need a new problem to solve, a trouble to get rid of, or an enemy
to destroy, if you wish. What kind of enemy it might be---depends.
[Aristotle](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Aristotle),
for example, [according to](https://www.wsj.com/articles/aristotles-pursuit-of-happiness-11548950094)
Edith Hall, believed that "happiness comes from a _continuous_ effort
to become the best possible version of yourself," which is
the war with yourself, "the worst enemy you can meet," as
[Zarathustra](https://www.goodreads.com/quotes/331586-but-the-worst-enemy-you-can-meet-will-always-be) once said.
On top of that, there are, of course, other foes all around us, including poverty, lack of skills,
health issues, annoying colleagues, or
[cheating partners]({% pst 2018/aug/2018-08-14-seventy-percent %}).
To be happy we need some of these things.
[Bertrand Russell](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bertrand_Russell), in his book
_The Conquest of Happiness_, [suggested](https://en.wikiquote.org/wiki/The_Conquest_of_Happiness)
that "to be without some of the things you want is an indispensable part of happiness."
However, the modern world, and especially the tech part of it, _gives_ us almost
anything and everything we may wish for, including the cars, houses, healthy
food, information, electric scooters, safety, lifetime employment and retirement plans.
We've got nothing to _worry_ about and ... we are unhappy because of that.
The key word here is "worry" not "give." Happiness doesn't really depend on
how rich or poor we are, as studies [confirm](http://content.time.com/time/magazine/article/0,9171,2019628,00.html)
(well, above a certain level). Instead, it depends on how _easily_ we get what we want.
The more we _worry_ and the less life _gives_ us for free, the more happy we are ...
provided we achieve what we want.
[Ernest Hemingway](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ernest_Hemingway) in
_The Garden of Eden_
[said](https://www.goodreads.com/quotes/2981-happiness-in-intelligent-people-is-the-rarest-thing-i-know)
that "happiness in intelligent people is the rarest thing I know."
This is because most "intelligent" people nowadays possess all those things
mentioned above and don't need to struggle much in order to get them.
The smarter we are, the easier it is for us _to achieve_: find a well-paid job
and buy a new iPhone.
We ~~intelligent~~ tech people, don't struggle enough.
Life doesn't challenge us as much as we need. We don't even need to have special talents
these days to be decently paid: You read [_JavaScript in 24 Hours_](https://amzn.to/2O1MBIg) and a new iPhone
is yours. The market is [in deficit](https://fullscale.io/the-talent-shortage-of-software-developers-in-2019/)
now and the demand is [much higher](https://www.techrepublic.com/article/cio-jury-83-of-cios-struggle-to-find-tech-talent/)
than the supply of coding hands. Moreover, most managers are
[incapable]({% pst 2017/aug/2017-08-01-how-to-manage-a-manager %}) of
demanding above-average performance from us. This may look like a perfect life,
but in a long run we may end up with problems
larger than unhappiness or depression---read what happened to the poor mice in the
[Universe 25](https://curiosity.com/topics/universe-25-began-as-a-mice-paradise-but-ended-as-a-nightmare-curiosity/)
experiment.
{% quote Tech people don't struggle enough, life doesn't challenge us as much as we need %}
What is the solution?
Listen to what [Frank T. McAndrew](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Francis_T._McAndrew)
[says](https://www.theguardian.com/commentisfree/2016/aug/17/psychology-happiness-contentment-humans-aspire-goals-accomplish-evolution):
"Dissatisfaction with the present and dreams of the future are what keep us motivated,"
meaning that happiness comes to those who
1) are permanently dissatisfied with current results and
2) act to achieve more.
Ergo, the recipe of happiness is: resent, overcome, repeat.
But what to resent? Well this may be
your laziness, your fears, your absence of Oracle certification, your
low Stack Overflow [reputation]({% pst 2017/feb/2017-02-14-stackoverflow-is-your-tool %}),
or no paychecks from the Apple Store (do you have
your own revenue-generating app there?)
Once the obstacle is overcome, repeat.
Stay unhappy. To be happy.